Sometimes, you read something and move on. But once in a while, you come across something that makes you drop your phone, sit down properly and think about life.
This is one of them.
I have lived for over five decades. I have seen good days and bad days, friendship and betrayal, success and disappointment. I have seen people rise from nothing, and I have seen people who thought they had everything suddenly come down.
There was no Dangote or Otedola when Chief MKO Abiola and Aare Musulumi of Yorubaland, late Alhaji Abdul'aziz Arisekola Alao, were dominating the pages of newspapers for providing welfare for the masses of this country.
None of the present gladiators in Nigerian politics was known when Chief Obafemi Awolowo and Chief Samuel Ladoke Akintola were leading Yoruba politics. Professor Ayodele Awojobi, Chief Tai Solarin and Chief Gani Fawehinmi were once great friends of the masses in the history of this country.
That's life. Soja go, soja come, but the barracks remain.
History has taught me that nothing lasts forever.
Life has also taught me that not everybody laughing with you is happy with you, and not everybody correcting you is your enemy.
Our Yoruba elders say:
“Ẹyin l’ọ̀rọ̀; tó bá bọ́ sílẹ̀, kò ṣeé kójọ mọ́.”
A word is like an egg. Once it falls, you cannot gather it back.
My people, think before you talk and always remember:
“Inú ẹni ni ń gbé. Ọ̀rọ̀ tá a sọ lónìí, tí ó di ìjà lọ́la, inú ẹni ni ń gbé!”
We should be mindful of what we say today that may cause quarrels tomorrow. Not everything we know must be said. Not every issue requires our opinion, and not every provocation deserves a response. Sometimes, it is simply better to keep certain things to ourselves.
Many relationships have been destroyed by five minutes of anger. Friendships of twenty years have ended because of careless words. You can say, “I am sorry,” but you cannot enter another person's brain and delete what you said.
As you grow older, you realise that silence is sometimes more powerful than having the last word.
Another lesson is this: take risks in life. If you win, you can lead; if you lose, you can guide.
Nothing meaningful comes without risk. Business is a risk. Marriage is a risk. Politics is a risk. Even friendship is a risk.
If you are waiting until everything is perfect before you move, you may wait forever. Take calculated risks. If you succeed, people can learn from you. If you fail, they can learn from your experience.
And please, stop judging people only by what they tell you.
People are not what they say; people are what they do. Judge them not by their words but by their actions.
Anybody can call you “my brother.” Anybody can say, “Baba mi.” Anybody can promise never to betray you.
Wait until money enters the matter. Wait until political power enters. Wait until there is an appointment, contract or opportunity to share. Wait until you are no longer useful to them.
That is when you will know who is who.
Watch people's actions more than their grammar.
When somebody hurts you, don't allow the pain to consume your life. Remember that the tree that bears the sweetest fruits usually receives the most stones.
Take the correction. Leave the noise. Move on.
Enjoy your life responsibly. If you can afford good food, eat. If you can travel, travel. If your parents are alive, visit them. If you love somebody, tell them. If somebody has been good to you, appreciate them while they can still hear you.
Being alive is already a special occasion.
Tomorrow is not anybody's property. We plan; God decides.
As you move through life, people will throw stones on your path. What matters is what you make from those stones—a wall or a bridge.
You can spend your life complaining about what people did to you, or you can turn those experiences into wisdom and continue your journey.
Everybody has problems. The poor man has his own. The billionaire has his own. The governor, president and king sitting on the throne have their own.
Even that person whose photographs you are looking at on social media and thinking, “God, when?” may be crying when the camera is switched off.
Never use another person's outside appearance to judge your own life. You don't know the full story.
And please, don't build your permanent residence in the past.
The past is a nice place to visit, but certainly not a good place to stay.
Learn from yesterday, but don't live there. Don't allow yesterday's success to become today's sleeping tablet.
Keep moving. Keep learning. Keep improving.
Because if you don't build your dreams, someone else will hire you to build theirs.
God has given us something extremely powerful—the human brain. Don't leave it idle. Think. Ask questions. Read. Learn. Observe.
Don't follow the crowd simply because everybody is running in the same direction. Sometimes, the crowd itself does not know where it is going.
It is not always what you don't have that limits you; sometimes, it is what you already have but don't know how to use.
Somebody is praying for the opportunity you are wasting. Somebody wishes they had the talent you refuse to develop or the small business you are ashamed of.
Look around again. Your blessing may already be inside your house while you are searching for it outside.
And never stop learning because what you fail to learn might eventually teach you a lesson. Unfortunately, life charges school fees too, and sometimes its school fees are very expensive.
Now, let us talk about integrity.
The difference between a corrupt person and an honest person is that the corrupt person has a price while the honest person has a value.
Price and value are not the same.
Money is good. There is nothing wrong with legitimately making money and enjoying the fruit of your labour. But your name must be more valuable than money.
Protect your name because when everything is finished, your name is what people will remember.
One of the most painful things in human relationships is betrayal of trust.
If you succeed in cheating someone, don't think that person is a fool. The person simply trusted you more than you deserved.
When somebody tells you his secret, don't use it against him when you quarrel tomorrow. When somebody helps you while you are down, don't suddenly develop amnesia when you rise.
Àìmọore buru ju ole lọ.
Ingratitude can sometimes be worse than stealing.
As I grow older, I understand life differently. At a certain stage, you stop being impressed by noise. You begin to value peace, loyalty, genuine friendship, health, family and, above everything, peace of mind.
My brothers and sisters, life is not as complicated as we sometimes make it.
Take calculated risks. Watch people's actions. Don't allow betrayal to turn you bitter. Stop living in yesterday. Build your dreams. Use your brain. Keep learning. Protect your integrity and never mistake another person's trust for foolishness.
And please, watch your mouth.
So speak carefully. Live responsibly. Be grateful. Be loyal. Be useful to humanity.
And while chasing money, position, power and recognition, don't forget to be a good human being.
Because one day, all the noise will stop.
What will remain is your name and the memories people have of how you treated them.
Ire o.
Mogaji Wole Arisekola writes from Ibadan.
I have lived for over five decades. I have seen good days and bad days, friendship and betrayal, success and disappointment. I have seen people rise from nothing, and I have seen people who thought they had everything suddenly come down.
There was no Dangote or Otedola when Chief MKO Abiola and Aare Musulumi of Yorubaland, late Alhaji Abdul'aziz Arisekola Alao, were dominating the pages of newspapers for providing welfare for the masses of this country.
None of the present gladiators in Nigerian politics was known when Chief Obafemi Awolowo and Chief Samuel Ladoke Akintola were leading Yoruba politics. Professor Ayodele Awojobi, Chief Tai Solarin and Chief Gani Fawehinmi were once great friends of the masses in the history of this country.
That's life. Soja go, soja come, but the barracks remain.
History has taught me that nothing lasts forever.
Life has also taught me that not everybody laughing with you is happy with you, and not everybody correcting you is your enemy.
Our Yoruba elders say:
“Ẹyin l’ọ̀rọ̀; tó bá bọ́ sílẹ̀, kò ṣeé kójọ mọ́.”
A word is like an egg. Once it falls, you cannot gather it back.
My people, think before you talk and always remember:
“Inú ẹni ni ń gbé. Ọ̀rọ̀ tá a sọ lónìí, tí ó di ìjà lọ́la, inú ẹni ni ń gbé!”
We should be mindful of what we say today that may cause quarrels tomorrow. Not everything we know must be said. Not every issue requires our opinion, and not every provocation deserves a response. Sometimes, it is simply better to keep certain things to ourselves.
Many relationships have been destroyed by five minutes of anger. Friendships of twenty years have ended because of careless words. You can say, “I am sorry,” but you cannot enter another person's brain and delete what you said.
As you grow older, you realise that silence is sometimes more powerful than having the last word.
Another lesson is this: take risks in life. If you win, you can lead; if you lose, you can guide.
Nothing meaningful comes without risk. Business is a risk. Marriage is a risk. Politics is a risk. Even friendship is a risk.
If you are waiting until everything is perfect before you move, you may wait forever. Take calculated risks. If you succeed, people can learn from you. If you fail, they can learn from your experience.
And please, stop judging people only by what they tell you.
People are not what they say; people are what they do. Judge them not by their words but by their actions.
Anybody can call you “my brother.” Anybody can say, “Baba mi.” Anybody can promise never to betray you.
Wait until money enters the matter. Wait until political power enters. Wait until there is an appointment, contract or opportunity to share. Wait until you are no longer useful to them.
That is when you will know who is who.
Watch people's actions more than their grammar.
When somebody hurts you, don't allow the pain to consume your life. Remember that the tree that bears the sweetest fruits usually receives the most stones.
Take the correction. Leave the noise. Move on.
Enjoy your life responsibly. If you can afford good food, eat. If you can travel, travel. If your parents are alive, visit them. If you love somebody, tell them. If somebody has been good to you, appreciate them while they can still hear you.
Being alive is already a special occasion.
Tomorrow is not anybody's property. We plan; God decides.
As you move through life, people will throw stones on your path. What matters is what you make from those stones—a wall or a bridge.
You can spend your life complaining about what people did to you, or you can turn those experiences into wisdom and continue your journey.
Everybody has problems. The poor man has his own. The billionaire has his own. The governor, president and king sitting on the throne have their own.
Even that person whose photographs you are looking at on social media and thinking, “God, when?” may be crying when the camera is switched off.
Never use another person's outside appearance to judge your own life. You don't know the full story.
And please, don't build your permanent residence in the past.
The past is a nice place to visit, but certainly not a good place to stay.
Learn from yesterday, but don't live there. Don't allow yesterday's success to become today's sleeping tablet.
Keep moving. Keep learning. Keep improving.
Because if you don't build your dreams, someone else will hire you to build theirs.
God has given us something extremely powerful—the human brain. Don't leave it idle. Think. Ask questions. Read. Learn. Observe.
Don't follow the crowd simply because everybody is running in the same direction. Sometimes, the crowd itself does not know where it is going.
It is not always what you don't have that limits you; sometimes, it is what you already have but don't know how to use.
Somebody is praying for the opportunity you are wasting. Somebody wishes they had the talent you refuse to develop or the small business you are ashamed of.
Look around again. Your blessing may already be inside your house while you are searching for it outside.
And never stop learning because what you fail to learn might eventually teach you a lesson. Unfortunately, life charges school fees too, and sometimes its school fees are very expensive.
Now, let us talk about integrity.
The difference between a corrupt person and an honest person is that the corrupt person has a price while the honest person has a value.
Price and value are not the same.
Money is good. There is nothing wrong with legitimately making money and enjoying the fruit of your labour. But your name must be more valuable than money.
Protect your name because when everything is finished, your name is what people will remember.
One of the most painful things in human relationships is betrayal of trust.
If you succeed in cheating someone, don't think that person is a fool. The person simply trusted you more than you deserved.
When somebody tells you his secret, don't use it against him when you quarrel tomorrow. When somebody helps you while you are down, don't suddenly develop amnesia when you rise.
Àìmọore buru ju ole lọ.
Ingratitude can sometimes be worse than stealing.
As I grow older, I understand life differently. At a certain stage, you stop being impressed by noise. You begin to value peace, loyalty, genuine friendship, health, family and, above everything, peace of mind.
My brothers and sisters, life is not as complicated as we sometimes make it.
Take calculated risks. Watch people's actions. Don't allow betrayal to turn you bitter. Stop living in yesterday. Build your dreams. Use your brain. Keep learning. Protect your integrity and never mistake another person's trust for foolishness.
And please, watch your mouth.
So speak carefully. Live responsibly. Be grateful. Be loyal. Be useful to humanity.
And while chasing money, position, power and recognition, don't forget to be a good human being.
Because one day, all the noise will stop.
What will remain is your name and the memories people have of how you treated them.
Ire o.
Mogaji Wole Arisekola writes from Ibadan.
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